People and Friends.


Has anyone ever asked you this question : 'So tell me about your best friend(s)!'
Its a very simple question really.
Ten years ago, I would have answered it by rattling on and on about all the people I'd have ever played with or attended birthday parties of.
But its different now.

Now if someone asks me this, I'll tell them that though I hang around with many people and that many count upon me as their friend, I don't have a particular 'group' I belong to or a 'Best friend' (Whatever that means.)

No, I'm not socially awkward or anything ; I'll warn you at the outset about that! In fact I pride myself of the ability to assess and react to a situation very quickly or adapt to things when needed. However, I do not get the concept of having a "Best Friend" anymore. I don't really think Friendship Day is a big deal either. In fact I'd like to use the term 'People I Know' for those people whose lives I touch everyday.

I know their birthdays, I get them good gifts. I cheer them up when I find them feeling low. I laugh with them or at them. I make them bunk classes or teach them things I know. I spend a lot of time with them and at times, I'm nowhere to be found. I'm somebody they can count on, always though I wish I could say the same about them.

They are 'People I Know'.

Would I cut off my right arm for one of them? I don't think so.

My concept of Friendship has been pretty much cut and dried. Surgically removed from all emotion - I would say.
It should be a practical arrangement, built along the lines of "Doing unto others, what you want them to do to yourself" and "A friend in need is a friend indeed."

Whats the point in being 'friends' when all you are is someone people bitch to about their crabby day? Of course, there' no harm in lending an ear, but that friend should also be the one who hauls you up by the ear when your grades slip.

There is a big difference between People and Friends. Friends are those people who satisfy the conditions given above. People are well...just people. I'm gonna be myself with them, simply because I don't believe in being a hypocrite.

Its funny how I operate on a dual frame. I'll talk about detachment from emotions and all that, yet miss those people in private. I'm more sentimental than all of them put together - collecting ticket stubs and what-not to 'save' those memories.

Maybe I have trouble acknowledging how much a person means to me in public. I believe in my actions speaking louder than empty words. I cringe at PDAs and emotional outbursts like crying in public. Its important for people to know that just because I didn't cry at the farewell, It doesn't mean I'm not sad to be leaving this place and its people.

I don't understand "Groups" either.
We're not 'congregating' like animals do. (Do animals 'congregate'?) Being in a group, I feel, robs one of his individuality. Before taking a decision, you must consult with your friends. If you move too ahead, you're criticized. If you lag behind, you get chucked out. I intend to be responsible for my feeling of 'self-worth' - thank you very much - and not leave it open to judgement by my peers.

Groups also have their own set of idiosyncrasies. Girls especially, will herd around and yet bitch about each other behind their backs at the first moment they get! It reminds me of wolves attacking a deer together to achieve their objective of getting its meat. The moment they kill it, fights ensue to snatch the largest portion one can.

I've grown up and learnt to not depend on people. If there's anything to do, I really don't care what people are up to. I'll just go and finish the damn thing! I don't understand why I need to submit the assignment when all my friends are doing so. If I've finished it, I'd like to get it off my hands ASAP. Of course, they're welcome to ask for help, but I really don't see the point in waiting.

I'll try to answer the question you must be having in your head by now, "Does she even have any friends?"

I do have people I value a lot.
In fact I don't expect anything from them, because I know that they're sure things. You see, friendships come to play when things happen when you least expect them to. When you have a test on Hindi that you know nothing about and your broke friend borrows money to buy you a Bournville to cheer you up. When you escape security guards together to get into a Fest or steal food from the mess to feed adopted strays. When you cover up for each other. Or finish each other's assignments. Or break down the persons door at 4 am in the night cuz you're hungry. Or call each other up for a head massage. When you indulge in ' कडकी में शेरिंग '. Or go and ' छेदों ' boys. Or fight for that last bite. When you discuss every dream and fear with each other. When you don't meet for days, yet can pick up right where you left off at.

When you look at each other and confidently say " We're so fucked!"

That's all folks !


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