So what if I love to Eat and Read? (and in that order?)

/hihi

I went to a family function this weekend and though it was great meeting everybody after such a long time, it did take its mental toll on me. /shock

Case in point being the endless 'aunty-talks'.
[They think you can't hear them and that's even worse!]

Part I:

Alright the food was amazing and I ate too much. I mean the waiters had to practically stop me from finishing the food by ignoring my looks of longing. The food was authentic Rajasthani cuisine in all its lovely Ghee-laden glory for crying out loud! Yes, I succumbed! Oh but it was such beautiful surrender....!

Those who know me will also know that my most  frequently used sentence in the day is "I'm hungry."
Tell me whats wrong with having a healthy appetite?
And add good (free) food to it and there you go.

Apparently all those aunties at the function had nothing to do but to watch me. One of them did say that I looked a bit fat. That I should eat less and exercise more. [I heard you woman!] /sweat

But tell me, who has the mental discipline to do crunches and lunges and squats and all those silly things?
I take a walk every now and then to burn the tension off. That and working non-stop throughout the day is pretty much the extent of my workout. No yoga for me man. Its just too damn somnolent! /dignose

I just have to say a few things.

I eat. I eat a lot. I eat many things. I'm not shy. I love food. We're best buds! Nothing you say will ever change that.

I prefer to have that tummy roll that is the side effect of too many Chocolate Fantasies. Yes, I know my limits too. But seriously. Live a little. The world would seriously be a happier place if we had enough (good) food (and water) for everybody.


Part II: The Inevitable.

The moment a girl gets tall in my family, the match-making aunties get together and start hounding her parents. My brother was called on to one side and interrogated about my age, qualifications and stuff. The creeps. I know what you're up to ladies. I'm watching you.

Thankfully Mum and Dad haven't paid much heed to them and are more concerned with me getting the best education they can provide me with. But you never know right?
Call it paranoia, but off late, I've been living under the constant fear of coming home one day and getting married off! /omg

/no

The Bit about Reading :

I read a lot of stuff. From the 'unmentionable novels' :P to those doomed to obscurity till someone discovers their genius 50 years later, and best-sellers  (of course, who doesn't read them anyway!)
Reading is associated with 'widening one's horizons' and 'learning' in most parts of the modernized world. If I'm sprawled across an arm chair and immersed into a book, it doesn't mean that I'm lazy.

Well that kind of sums up my (fragile) mental state.
You take care :)

/bye

That woman inside of me.


That woman inside of me.

Traditionally, women have been expected to be care-givers, home-makers and a source of happiness and comfort around the house. When young, they're brought up in shades of pink, given dance lessons, taught how to sing, sew and cook. Along with it, they're expected to study as hard as they can so that they can get to the best educational institutions in the world. By the time they're 13, they're supposed to bid their childhood male friends goodbye, sit properly with their legs crossed, modulate their voices, be mindful of what the think of their clothes and attitude. Get to college, and a few years of living free give you the taste of what life can also be. A few years working. But you hit 25 and you get married off. You're expected to have kids as soon as possible, then raise them in the proper way, be the glue between families, be the trophy wife.

I only have one question.
Where did all those dreams go? Did you run out of time? Or did you just dismiss them as the innocence of youth and make friends with what came your way?

Are women ever in control of their lives? First there are parents, then the husband comes along. Its a show in which the puppeteer keeps changing while the puppet looks on.

I would blame it all on society. Most men only repeat what they have seen happening in their homes. Moms are expected to wash your clothes, give you food etc etc. When her time is up, its your wife who does it. 
If that wasn't enough, Society frowns upon women who don't marry.  Brands them as deficient or worse, immoral. Sees every male you go out with as a lover. Censors your thoughts, your words, your clothes.

WHY should women conform to these traditional roles? Shouldn't men have to be equally responsible for the of children? For making the morning tea?

Yes, there is a small minority of enlightened men who don't subjugate women to this modern form of bonded labor. But by and large, the Indian male thinks pretty much in the same way.

Why is it that Women cannot go solo. That they 'need' men. Tell me why. If she needs a man for all the hardware work around he house, there are power-tools and other labour saving devices available in the market to help her. For having kids? Isn't it her personal choice? She can adopt or opt for sperm banks. If she needs a man for security, then well, we live in a very sad state where a woman cannot be safe in the first place! 

I'm not against companionship. Of course its lovely to have a witness to your life. But why live life like the hours are running out? To jump from one level to another, like a game of Icy Tower.

Who doesn't want to live free? With no sword of "marriage by 25" looming over her head? Travel the world? Do those things you read about, or saw in the movies? After all, why did you study so much or  get a job? To update your resume? To be more in demand in the marriage market?

Maybe some female readers will agree with me on what I say. Some women don't even think this way. Some of them have got their marriages planned in their heads since they were 6.

The woman inside of me, she's stopped asking me why I don't listen to her. Why I don't let go. Why I must be careful about what society thinks of me. Why I need a man by my side.
For me, rebellion would be to let go. To be the woman I really am. To not live like a shadow of who i am. To be in control of my life. To not having to bow down to the right time-frames for doing things. To simply be.

********************************************************************************************
I'm sitting in the womens coach of the metro as I type this. And the lady sitting next to me couldn't help but read this article. She agrees with me and we had a very lively discussion on what we would do if we didn't have to be all this :) So hopefully I'm on the right track with this.

Vienna :)

/hihi

I first heard this song when I was a teenager, [Yes  :) Now that I'm 20, I do have the liberty of not calling myself a teenager anymore!] when I was watching 13 going on 30. Till date, its one of those movies that I ca watch again and again.
I saw that movie at a time when I was going through the "I wanna grow up fast" phase. I could completely identify with Jenna (the protagonist) and her wish to be one of the popular girls in school, her taking inspiration from magazines and movies and all that, her not being able to understand the bigger picture or seeing that love could be found in any form and in the most unlikeliest of places.

Yes, the movie did have some unreal moments, but keeping all that aside, my take-away from the movie was so strong, that I still love it. :)

This song - Vienna - plays when Jenna realizes what shes done with her life and wishes she could turn back time. She realizes that what she wanted and has now achieved, is so shallow. She no longer has any real friends or the love of her mum and dad. What humbles her is that her mum and dad are still accepting of her, regardless of her missing Christmas' and losing touch with them.

That's the movie interpretation of the song.

My interpretation is somewhat different.
I heard this song today and really focused on the lyrics while taking a long walk.

The lyrics go like :


Slow down, you crazy child 
you're so ambitious for a juvenile 
But then if you're so smart, tell me 
Why are you still so afraid? 

Where's the fire, what's the hurry about? 
You'd better cool it off before you burn it out 
You've got so much to do and 
Only so many hours in a day 

But you know that when the truth is told.. 
That you can get what you want or you get old 
You're gonna kick off before you even 
Get halfway through 
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you? 

Slow down, you're doing fine 
You can't be everything you want to be 
Before your time 
Although it's so romantic on the borderline tonight 
Tonight,... 
Too bad but it's the life you lead 
you're so ahead of yourself that you forgot what you need 
Though you can see when you're wrong, you know 
You can't always see when you're right. you're right 

You've got your passion, you've got your pride 
but don't you know that only fools are satisfied? 
Dream on, but don't imagine they'll all come true 
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you? 

Slow down, you crazy child 
and take the phone off the hook and disappear for awhile 
it's all right, you can afford to lose a day or two 
When will you realize,..Vienna waits for you? 
And you know that when the truth is told 
that you can get what you want or you can just get old 
You're gonna kick off before you even get half through 
Why don't you realize,. Vienna waits for you 
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you? 



The lyrics, the composition.
It makes me tear up. It makes me stop. It makes me happy. It makes me wait and wonder.
I am the "crazy child" who needs to realize that her "Vienna" waits for her.
No, it doesn't ask me to sit on my bum and do nothing. Just asks me to cool it off before I burn it out. I'll expire before I get half-way through unless I listen. I can be everything I want to be before my time :)

I can go on and on. This song is right on so many levels.
Today I feel as if somebody is actually singing this to me. I feel like someones written it with me in mind. It reverberates within my soul. This is my song.



/bye


When there are too many words in your head.

/hihi

Does your head sometimes feel like a packed suitcase? With a few clothes poking out? Mine sure does. /shock
With this academic year coming to a close, I feel like there is sooo much to do and so little time!

I mean today is 8th March. I will be having exams in May. Hence, I'm gonna be in college til maximum May end. That gives me about 80 days.

80 days and *poof* !
College life - Over!

Did I think that these 3 years will pass by so soon back in 2009?
Never!
It was all like a dark screen. The year 2012 seemed so far away, we thought it would never come!

But now that its here.. well... I don't know what to say!

/bye

Melancholia.

/hihi

I love going for long walks around North Campus everyday. :)
Today, I lay down on the grass in our college lawn, hugging a small patch of earth and staring at the sky.
At that moment, I felt like I belonged here. I still feel that right now.
This Hostel, this college - I've seen it grow from a mess to what it is now.
Its nothing that great, but its poised at a point where it can only rise ahead from. 3 years have seen so much. And shown even more.

I still wonder at the mystery of Fate that brought me here. I never decided that I would come here. Hell, I never even knew that when I'd grow up, I would become an Eco-grad. (An Economist is too fancy a term I think.)

I'm glad I'm here. I've got a lot from you dear Fate. Thanks for all of it, the good as well as the bad. :)

Like my college, my life too is poised at a point where I have a lot to look forward to.
Its gonna be a lot of challenges ahead, a lot of new stuff. I think I'll be able to buffet that wave by God's grace.

Until that time comes, I'm happy hugging this piece of earth that I can call mine.

/bye !!

Live. Love. Eat.